How to Diffuse Your Worst Fears

I want you to imagine a child who is afraid to go to sleep because she is afraid of the dark.

Afraid of “monsters under the bed.”

Lying there in bed, she imagines all kinds of scary things.

And her fear gets more and more intense.

And she cries out to her parents.

Her dad comes into the room and turns the light on.

They get out a flashlight, and look under the bed.

And there are no monsters.

Just some shoes, a lost hair tie, a stuffed animal.

Nothing to really be scared of.

And maybe when he leaves, her dad turns on a nightlight.

So that she can always see what is really there.

The same is true with any of our fears.

When we leave them unexamined, they get scarier and scarier.

We imagine all kinds of things.

And we avoid really thinking about what we are scared of at all costs.

But when you examine your fears, they get much less scary.

A great way to examine them is to answer the “What Ifs.”

Your brain gives you a ton of what ifs.

And usually you just let them sit there.

Instead, go ahead and answer them. And keep asking and answering until it completely runs out.

Shining a light on the scary monsters under the bed, the scary what ifs, takes away their power.

When you know what you will do, how you might handle the scariest situations, they aren’t as bad.

And you realize for many of them, how very unlikely they are.

So take one of your fears and answer all the what ifs.

And do that each and every time with all the fears your brain throws at you.